I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
