my vag is so smooth its legendary
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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