people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
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