How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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