Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You're like the curious george of whores
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
