we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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