she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
