He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
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