Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
