we have officially lost it.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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