is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
