even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
did you just send me my own nude
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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