I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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