That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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