so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
