Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I deserve this hangover.
Your penis caused this!
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
