then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
