If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
