I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Randomize
