If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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