I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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