It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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