New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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