My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize