Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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