areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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