Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
