You made me cry and you don't even care
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
please come you make the beer taste better
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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