You made me cry and you don't even care
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
