11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
how can u be prego again
okay pat passed out under dana's car
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Randomize
