He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize