i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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