you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
