My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Randomize
