we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize
