What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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