just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
