After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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