My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Why is your signature on my underwear?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
