handjob tips. give me some.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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