listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize
