i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize