I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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