it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
