My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
