I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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