Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
