So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
