lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
