so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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